The internets

I have been using this interweb contraption for quite sometime.  My friend Ryan had the internet, but it was a creature we did no speak of. He needed to ask his dad for permision, which was for the best because we were probably 8 at the time.  Before long, my household was in posession of a disc, alleging a free month of AOL service.  Fortunately, this month turned into a year or so, and we used screen names my mom created to include 721, our street adress.  However, I think Ian's was something like cheesecow721 because thats just the kind of boy he is.  Once we signed in, the blips and bleeps of the dial-up connection had ended and we were connected to the world. So we played "fat boy raids the cookie factory" on eZone.com

Robby had discovered a 1982 Penthouse calander with risque pictures of big-bushed women, and the month of April had the biggest, thickest bush (and sexy green eyes).  The house was too risky, so we had to store the treasure in the bamboo forest.  I hate to admit it, but the fiend I am led me back into the wood under the cover of night and I annexed the goods, brought them home, and must have left it under the bathroom mat because next thing I knew, I was in trouble.. big trouble. But I needed to see more bush. 

Before long, I was using the internet to get the things I wanted. And at 11 and 12, it was pictures of naked women.  Needless to say, I was incredibly motivated and therefore, doubly crafty.